"You'd make a great life coach. It pays well too." So said the expert life coach who I'd called for some unexplainable reason. After viewing several free business webinars I knew she is the real thing. Maybe this was why I'd called her? Why not? I'd just told her that my heart's desire has always been to partner with my husband to bring in some money and help him carry the load to provide for our home. My mom helped my dad. My sister -in-law works outside the home to help my brother. Why not me?
Our older two daughters reveled in the thought of a job where I could make good money. They both asked to see if I could get them a job. You know what? The affirmation was huge. Someone had singled me out and "legitimized" my job skills. When most of my friends are retiring, I'd be taking that plunge into the marketplace in a way that would not only be building others careers, but, I'd be paid well.
We could give more to the church, to the ministries we already supported. My husband could think about retiring at a younger age. I could replace the 30 year old sofa in the living room that our dog used as a chew toy.
But just like every other outwardly shining example to my own goodness, God chipped away at my reasoning. Why did I really want to help hubby to make money for the house? Because I'd finally feel relevant.
Through prayer and a multitude of wise family members and friends one by one every desire has been stripped down so that I could see the true purpose of my generosity. Like a cheap toy, my 'goodness' has been turned upside down to show the "made in China" label underneath.
A label of "competent" is peeled away and replaced with the seal of "bought and paid for by a Savior."
A label of "super woman" is peeled away and replaced by the seal of "saved by grace."
A label of "Look what I can do" is peeled away and replaced by the seal of "look what He's done for me."
When I gave my encourager the answer, she understood. After all, in the end, all we really want to hear is "well done good and faithful servant."